have fun at your own discretion...
have fun at your own

Seated at my favorite table at my favorite pub enjoying my well- deserved cold drink. Well, it’s just another Friday and am chilling after a long week of grinding and  a spa treat would be nice but hey, I love the view from where am seated and the comedian in my head is on a roll……

Well here goes,


You took the time to dress up and ensure you have a plus one to go along with you for that night out with Steve….. or Scott….. or whoever, otherwise referred to as the “ATM” for the night. Well, am all for handling my bill you know , GIRL POWER, and quite  aware free drinks are very  inviting, but why in God’s blue skies  would you subject yourself to constant torture of “how many should I have?”.

Mr. nice philanthropic guy decides to take a walk, well maybe to account for  the unaccounted for plus one, leaving a more than desperate damsel in distress, kabambe on the hand , and the constant , “where did he go?”, “call him?” ,”wanna share my drink?”,

Here I am, no need for no soap operas, my favorite spot got me covered and my drinks keep flowing, coz well, I take pride in ensuring I can control the outcome. We don’t always anticipate all outcomes, but don’t go in blind, bring along a girl, or two for all I care, but make sure you can pick up the tab or better yet “BAE” is on board.

For now am glad this chap did come back….the smile on her face upon his sighting is nothing short of epic…. Talk about that moment the Almighty saviour makes a comeback!!!!!


When the walls start caving in


I don’t write for the sake of writing, I write that which I feel. I write what I need to get off my chest, and right now after days of silence I finally can say this.
It’s okay to be tired of your thoughts. Everything doesn’t need to make sense all at once. Take 10 seconds at a time, after those run out, refresh and take another 10. Before you know it everything you need and want will unfold in its appropriate time
It’s ok to want some time out. It might feel a bit selfish but once you find yourself snapping at the cat, it’s time to take a chill pill and reconnect with yourself. So, if no one is bleeding,the house is not on fire and there is no one having open heart surgery in the next few hours, honey please, CHILL!!!
Planning is always advised but keep in mind plans change, and that’s okay too. We don’t always anticipate all the outcomes, so when a not-so-ideal situation arises, refrain from plucking your eyebrows. Brace for impact and bounce back as soon as possible
At the end of it all, a tired woman is not a pleasant sight and she makes for very bad company.
Time to get up, dress up and rock the world once again….


The strongest woman I know

She has always had my back; she has always supported my silly and outright ridiculous ideas. She is always at the ready with a smile and an encouraging ear. She is my number one fan and is always there to receive me. She is the first sight I saw as I entered this cold and unforgiving world. The first hand I held, the very first kiss I shared. She is my mother.
She has taught me the ways of the world as she perceives it and she is always honest with her opinions and thoughts. She is always giving up her dreams so I can realize mine. Now, many years later, though far from my dreams, because I keep dreaming larger than life possibilities, I get to say, “Mom, I get it now”
All the fights at adolescence and all the mean words I said to you; all the misunderstandings and all the arguing, “You were right”. I wish I knew then what I know now.
It takes being a parent to put it all into perspective; I’d give everything up a thousand times over if it means making my kids’ life a little more enlightened. Not handing over everything in a pretty bow and the proverbial silver spoon but providing options and guidance and let my little angels explore this world of opportunities.
Through you mother, I have learnt to be head strong and that self-confidence and holding on to my values will see me through all treacherous waters.
So today I say “THANK YOU”. Thank you mom for all you had to endure, from the sleepless nights, to the constant nagging. Thank you for being my rock and thankyou for being my black woman that rocks.



Don’t take this the wrong way but hey, I think bro’s are cool. Fall outs are normal but with boys they’d only fall out over global warming, missing weapons of mass destruction or something of the same magnitude of importance. We sisters on the other hand are on another parallel universe because we would gut you over our misplaced favorite turquoise lipstick liner….or you know, a more mundane, but “earth shattering thing she cannot live without.”
For boys, the fridge is empty because well, we ate it all not because last Wednesday we were to go shopping and instead you went and worked a night shift. Easy problems have easy solutions. The fridge is empty, let’s go and shop, the car is faulty; I will go and get if fixed. This however doesn’t occur to us ladies. The car gets a flat “I have been telling you for three months that my tyres are worn out, Now I will be late for the salon, I won’t make dinner in time, because I didn’t have time to shop, because you worked late that day we were supposed to shop, and because you don’t seem to have time for us, I will pick “toto” from school and we will go to my mom’s house.” Then I hang up and leave ‘bae’ with the WTF just happened look on his face.
If your girl uses any of these very common but very confusing statements your safest move is to ABORT MISSION!!!! “FINE”, “OK”, “GO RIGHT AHEAD”, “NO REALLY HAVE FUN” “IT’S OKAY, I DON’T MIND TAKING A MAT” I don’t know why we do it, usually with squinted eyes, arms crossed and the perfect angle of a smile.  The “I DARE YOU’ look at the ready, the armed forces cannot fathom the force behind those words. I think it is our way of asking to get your time and attention without looking needy and entitled. Piece of advice though; if you drive, She ALWAYS minds taking a mat.
And my favorite, getting ready, “honey five more minutes” well grab your unfinished cross word puzzle and get ready, the 50 step ritual is gonna be a while, awesomeness doesn’t just happen,  a simple tee, pants and loafers don’t fit the deal, lest you go ogling the mannequins.
I have tried putting myself in the shoes of boy since I started writing this piece, and I am Tired as FUCK!!!!
I think I will just go back to my team of ladies tormenting the living daylights out of you guys…… It is after all what we girls are best at.
If I were a boy………. Naaaaaah!!!!!!

5 simple phrases to remember

I may not know much, but i know this...
I may not know much, but i know this…

Learn from your mistakes and past experiences

They say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, I see it as what doesn’t kill you in the first round just might in round two if you didn’t learn at the first instance. Being hit twice in the same place and the damage worse the first time is a flaw on your part, a weakness that the attacker/perpetrator has noticed.

Do not underestimate anyone

Trust is a beautiful thing to behold, to uphold and to protect; it should be earned, as even your shadow leaves in times of darkness. Be vigilant and never show all your cards. Time is a fundamental thing, as one gets close, with time you learn to trust and let your guard down, keep in mind the world revolves on selfish interests, “the invisible hand”

To get half of what they have, you got to be twice as smart as they are

Nothing will be handed on a silver platter. Not even a cup of coffee.  Everything worth having is worth toiling for. Short cuts to success are just that; short and cut, they will not stand the test of time, and cosmic justice has quite the sense of humor, once one piece falls, the house of cards is dominos in motion, one after the other. Put in the work, believe it can be done and remember success is not measured against what other people have. You don’t know what they had to give up in order to get it.

Think, calculate, pre-empt

Yes simple yet often overlooked, you can never be too prepared, like in a game of chess anticipate your opponents next move. Do not let things get you off guard; or throw you off your game. Sure, surprises occur and plans change. Think, in every situation, think it through, that way you can live with the outcome, every action has an equal reaction.

Lastly, believe in a greater power than your own, pray, hold on to your faith and do not waiver from your beliefs, without some sense of guidance and direction, we are savages.

With that said, I hope we all live to fight another day………………………


protect all at all cost
protect all at all cost

It is an actual dream having the President speak my name, let alone write me a Personal letter, signed, sealed and delivered by a government official
To have the highest office in the land acknowledging my existence, my importance in the nation and my contributions past, present and future to this great land would be a dream come true. What my overactive imagination didn’t expect was that all this would happen, but only after such a great loss.
He knows my name, knows my value, acknowledges the lost potential, but his forces, his apparatus that jump when he asks were not there to protect me from the hail of bullets. He knows am gone, and “shares” in my family’s loss, but if I was as important and as significant, if my life was as valuable as he now purports it is, shouldn’t the response have come sooner?
I didn’t live to witness my dream of the man I voted for, My President writing my name, but I realized it in death…. Leaving my family with a written memoir of my passing, and because it’s from the President it maybe be accorded a frame and hung in the living room just beside my portrait, always to be shown off to visitors.
A letter doesn’t do me much good now, does it? If I was applying for a job and he wrote me a recommendation, maybe then. If I needed a loan and he wrote me a guarantor’s note, maybe then, but now, I am too dead to need any of these things.
If I was as important I shouldn’t have had to die from the bullet of a Coward’s Gun. My Government, My President should have done better to Preserve my life.